...cancer free. 1095 days to go 'til my five years are up.
i got turned down yesterday at the office blood drive. i never even thought that having had cancer was an automatic disqualifier for donating blood. the little five minute interaction with the nurse made me quite emotional. the tears didn't start to fall until i was in the stairwell of my office building, but i couldn't put my finger on why it made me cry until i was home and in the sanctuary of my bedroom.
it made me worried that the cancer would come back.
i know it won't come back...because i have a feeling that it won't and, more importantly, the odds are against it.
but when a very official nurse-type tells you that you can't do something that you thought you were 100% healthy enough to do, it can give a girl reason to pause and think about why the nurse-type would say that.
the very logical part of my being knows that it has nothing to do with me specifically...that there are tables and charts and graphs that tell the medical community that most of those with cancer shouldn't give blood because of the possibility that the cancer could be laying dormant in their systems.
it is not about ME.
but honestly, i really just wanted the free sweatshirt.